How to Raise an Adult


What really matters when it comes to helping a child become a competent, confident and caring adult?

During 10 years as Dean of Freshmen at Stanford University, author Julie Lythcott-Haims took notice of the escalating number of high-achieving students who lacked the self-reliant skills needed to become competent adults.

In her acclaimed book “How to Raise an Adult,” she turns to research and draws from her experience with Stanford students to explain how parents can help rather than hinder their children’s ability to acquire the skills needed for independent, successful living.

Bainbridge parents and educators will have an opportunity to hear author Julie Lythcott-Haims’ observations and recommendations in person by joining her and Raising Resilience at BHS Commons on Wednesday, February 3, 7:30 – 9 p.m. for the upcoming presentation.

Families with children of all ages will benefit from  her message. It is never too early to help children build the skills needed to become thriving adults.


Learn more by clicking here.



Getting to Calm While Parenting Young Children?

getting to calmWe’re excited to welcome Dr. Laura Kastner back to Bainbridge Island on October 20, 2015, at 7:30 p.m. This event is for caregivers, parents, and educators of young children (ages 2 to 7), as well as any other adults interested in the topic.

Dr. Laura Kastner will share from her newest book, Getting to Calm: The Early Years, which includes evidence-based strategies that help parents learn why and how to raise resilient children by utilizing positive discipline, while also promoting the tenets of mindful parenting.

Learn more, and register, here.

Summer Enrichment?

SummerWhat are the summer plans for your family? Wouldn’t it be wonderful if Bainbridge Island was a place where a kid could still be a kid? Check out this article from the New York Times parenting blog that explores how “…a pre-programmed, enriched, spoon-fed, caged in, ‘checklisted childhood’ … can come at the expense of self-efficacy — a true, innate sense of self that is undermined when a person has too much of the stuff of life planned and handled for them.”

Raising Resilience will be bringing this writer, author Julie Lythcott-Haims, to Bainbridge in February. Her book, How to Raise an Adult was released this month. Stay tuned!

Be a part of the change you wish to see

BHYA_logo (2)This brutal post from a junior high school student in Palo Alto is heartbreaking, and speaks to a lot of what we hear from Bainbridge High School students about stress and pressure.

Let’s do better for our youth on Bainbridge Island. Want to be a part of the change you want to see? Please join us for the fourth Bainbridge Healthy Youth Summit on April 25, 2015.

Tween Territory: Expert Insights (April 11, 2015)

Registration is now open for our Parenting Right in the Middle Spring Forum, called Tween Territory: Expert Insights. We’ve gathered three expert speakers to address topics on the minds of parents of tweens (grades 5 through 8):

Julie Metzger, RN, MN will talk about The Art & Science of Parenting Tweens
Stefanie Thomas, MA, from the Seattle Police Department, will address internet and cell phone safety, and
Dr. Leslie R. Walker, from Children’s Hospital, will talk about risky behaviors and protective factors.

Learn more, and register, here. The forum will be held at Woodward Middle School, starting at 8:30 a.m. (program starts at 9) on Saturday, April 11, 2015. Hope you can join us!

Community Conversation March 25: Igniting Your Child’s Spark

Our next Community Conversation will be March 25,  7pm – 8:30 p.m. at Bainbridge High School, Room 303.

Come join an engaging conversation about the importance of nurturing the path to human thriving in our kids.

We’ll watch a TED Talk by Peter Benson (former President of The Search Institute, which created the Developmental Assets framework) and talk about helping our children ignite their “spark” — a gift, which if encouraged and tended, will help them thrive throughout their life.
RSVP by commenting here, or email
Community Conversations are monthly gatherings intended to hold a space for conversations that matter – a place to share ideas, information, concerns and celebrations that contribute to nurturing a sense of well-being and connection within our families and community.


Parenting Right in the Middle: What do Teens/Tweens wish you knew?

PRITM Logo (1)“Do I make you proud?
Do you get me now?
Am I your pride and joy?”
~Brandi Carlile

We are looking forward to our Parenting Right in the Middle event tomorrow night, which will be a panel discussion with young adults and their parents. This video deals with many of the things teens, parents, and families wish they could talk about with each other, and it addresses the importance of building safe attachment during the tween and teen years.

Standardized Testing

testIt’s testing time! Well, it almost always is, isn’t it? Locally, we have some changes in store for our students. Kids in grades 3 through 8, plus grade 11, will be participating in Smarter Balanced Testing this Spring. Parents have many opportunities to learn more about it, both online and in-person at information sessions this spring, from Bainbridge Island School District’s new Director of Assessment, Dr. Jeff McCormick. Click here for more information.

Opinions very widely on the usefulness of testing, and how the results should impact staffing, funding, and curriculum. But in this opinion piece in The Boston Globe, Williams College psychologist Dr. Susan Engle points out that “…almost no one has publicly questioned a fundamental assumption — that the tests measure something meaningful or predict something significant beyond themselves.” She suggests seven things that really should be tested, including Reading, Flexible Thinking, and Collaboration.

What do you think of this list? What else should be added?

Image: David Hernandez


Developing Self-Discipline in Tweens

PRITM Logo (1)Registration is now open for our next Parenting Right in the Middle event on February 24, 2015. Tools for the Tough Stuff: Limits, Boundaries and Expectations will be about setting limits and boundaries.

When it comes to enforcing those limits, questions pop up about punishment, consequences, and control. Are there more effective ways to think about this? This article by Dr. Laura Markam asks us to consider more positive, learner-growth mindset alternatives that nurture self-discipline in our kids.
This post is part of our Tools for Intentional Parenting (TIPs), a part of the Parenting Right in the Middle program. Throughout this school year, we will share articles, videos and Q&A with experts via email and this blog. If you would like to receive these TIPs via email, please sign up.

Life Success for Students with Learning Disabilities: What Does the Research Say?

marshall-raskindJoin us January 31, 2015, 11 a.m. – 12:30 p.m.

Dayaalu Center on Bainbridge is hosting a talk by Raising Resilience board member, Marshall Raskind, PhD.

While acknowledging the importance of “school success,” it is critical not to discount the broader notion of “life success”. Drawing from his own 20-year study that traced the lives of children with learning disabilities from childhood into adulthood, Dr. Raskind will discuss the factors predictive of positive life outcomes. He will also present a conceptual model for fostering these “success attributes” in youth with learning disabilities.

RSVP by email:

About Dr. Raskind

Dr. Raskind is an educational researcher and consultant on Bainbridge Island. He is former Director of Research and Special Projects at the Charles and Helen Schwab Foundation in San Francisco where he provided guidance and leadership to their program initiatives in learning and attention problems. Immediately prior to his position at the Foundation, he served as Director of Research at the Frostig Center in Pasadena, California, conducting scientific studies of learning disabilities. He is former head of the California State University, Northridge Learning Disability Program and Computer Access Lab. He has served as consulting editor to the Journal of Learning Disabilities, Learning Disability Quarterly, Annals of Dyslexia, Journal of Special Education Technology, and Intervention in School and Clinic. Dr. Raskind is a Fellow and past Vice President of the International Academy for Research in Learning Disabilities, as well as a former member of the Research Committee of the Council for Learning Disabilities, and the Professional Advisory Board of the National Center for Learning Disabilities.

His research interests are in the areas of learning disabilities across the lifespan, factors predictive of “life success,” technological interventions, transition, and the impact of online social networking on children with learning and attention problems. Dr. Raskind is a frequent invited presenter at international education conferences and is the author of numerous professional publications including books, book chapters, and peer-reviewed research studies. His research has led to the development of widely used curricula, interventions, and technologies.

Dr. Raskind has a Ph.D. in Education from Claremont Graduate School.